Bluebird Rising

"You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better." -Anne Lamott

And On Rebounding January 27, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — bluebirdrising @ 3:01 pm
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No doubt you read about the demise that was this last month. If you didn’t, scroll down a bit and catch up.

Really. It’s quite riveting.

Or maybe not so much.

But the point is, that I am motivated and ready to welcome in a new month that will have more good things around the corner than bad. So motivated, in fact, that Dex and I are having a Happy New Month Eve party next week. Because his month sucked too. Much worse than mine, actually. But I am better at being dramatic and loud mouthed about it, so my story is the one we will focus on here.

Which reminds me: Dex has not yet been introduced. Dex is the boyfriend. But I hate the word boyfriend. He hates the word boyfriend. But he’s more than a guyfriend, and the only other somewhat related word I can conjure up right now is manfriend, which sounds like a child molester who roams West River Road in a windowless van. So we’ll stick with Dex, which is what I called him on the first date anyways.

Moving on.

So what does this better month look like at my house? It means not job searching for a while. It means focusing on the job I have now, maybe working some overtime, and paying down some loans so that I have flexibility in the future to take a pay cut if need be. It means resting my brain from cover letters, applications and interview questions. And, as a result, restrengthening faith in myself that I will need when I do start looking again.

But it also means broadening my horizons. Doing something different. Seeing a new perspective that might open a door I have walked by for years. I want to smile more. I want to feel accomplished again. It’s sad when you realize you haven’t felt that way in a long time. And it’s something I’m excited to get back to.

Here’s the roadmap:

WRITE

I want to write, more so on here than I have been, but in new ways as well. I have previously written publicly in a few scenarios, but never at a level challenging enough in which I felt I could really ever fail. I want to fail. I want my writing critiqued, and corrected, and forced to expand further than my initial thoughts jotted down on paper. I’m going to start with Open Mics, courtesy of Hazel & Wren, a literary collaborative in MSP. I have no idea what to expect, and how it will go, but I am excited to connect with a group of people over a similar interest.

VOLUNTEER

I attended training last spring for the Highland Friendship Club, a program in St. Paul that organizes activities for young adults with disabilities. Unfortunately, I was not able to volunteer then with my work schedule, but, pending some paperwork, everything seems to be a go this time around. I immediately became interested in helping with the Cooking Classes and the Girls Nights Out events, and we won’t even discuss how excited I am that their biggest event of the year is a Halloween party.

LEARN

The community ed booklet came in the mail about a month ago. I post-it note flagged about 16 classes. After many dramatic moments of indecision, I signed up for Sign Language. I start April 4th.

KNITTING

I think. I haven’t quite decided yet. I had an extremely crafty college roommate who handmade some REALLY cool stuff, and one winter taught the whole house how to knit. And, for the five straight weeks of winter break, we all spent every free in front of the tv, knitting, just like our own personal nursing home. And then I forgot about it. So maybe I’ll reteach myself how to knit. Or maybe I won’t. But I want to learn how to make SOMETHING. I have an entire board on Pinterest of DIY ideas and I am not a DIY person. How stupid is that? I am realizing that I actually need to make time to DO these things.

TATTOOS

I have been planning on doing a huge piece on my back for years now. It’s time to just do it. Well, it’s time to meet with a designer and get the drawing finalized, more specifically. Baby steps.

DAY ZERO PROJECT

After a pretty solid start, that poor little list has been recently neglected. And I am not okay with that anymore.

Throw in some Social Science about PIRATES (!!!!), learning to infuse alcohol with yummy flavors, and an Espresso Royale Reunion that I have finally planned after months of reminiscing about, and I think I’ll be sufficiently busy with tons of good stuff in the months ahead.

It’s going to be an interesting adventure. But for the first time in a long time, I am excited and anxious in a way that is energizing, not draining. And it already feels a  little bit amazing.

And so, I wish a Happy New Month Eve to you as well.

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4 Responses to “And On Rebounding”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    That’s my girl ! It’s good to have you back. Say Hi to Dex and let him know we were excited to hear about him also.
    I love you so much – M

  2. Anonymous Says:

    Good Luck Amy, that all sounds really fun!
    Maggie


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